It’s okay if you are in therapy (therapy is nothing to be ashamed of, sometimes we all need someone to talk, if you do find one as soon as you can be healthy and happy<3)
Something is seriously wrong with me.
So I’m weening myself off this Geodon shit. The withdrawal effects are worse than the side effects. At least I hope that’s all that’s wrong with me.
My BP plummets and skyrockets on a moment’s notice. Normal BP is 120/80 and normal pulse is 100. One hour it’ll hit 150/90, my pulse hits 178, and my head will spin, heart racing like it’s going to burst out of my chest. The next hour it’s 65/28 and my pulse is 58.
I can’t breathe. I keep blacking out when I stand up, cracking my head on the floor each time. My muscles spasm and my legs fall out from under me, my face locking in random positions.
I’m scared. I can’t function like this.
iced mochas make me sick.
BUT I’M GETTING ONE TOMORROW. I’ve been craving it for 6 weeks. And tomorrow I’ll have it goddammit. Fuck my blood pressure, fuck my medication, fuck everything because I’m drinking an iced mocha. Obsessed.
